Halloween – Schmalloween

What is the big freaking deal about Halloween?

It’s a holiday, people.

Yes, I know it’s a holiday with a long and sordid past, when Satanists gather to worship, and when crazies murder people. But are you trying to tell me crazies don’t murder people on Easter? Or that those Satanists do nothing the rest of the year?

Isn’t it possible we’re feeding into the hype by being all paranoid about it?

And yes, it does have origins in the pagan world. But so does Christmas. Is that any reason to (as my Pastor once put it) shoot Santa Claus? Okay, you can save the joke about “Satan” Claus. I’ve heard it all before. You holiday spoilers.

If you ask me, the spooky part of Halloween is how people let their kids go door to door collecting candy from strangers. Now that’s scary. And a little creepy.

What really disgusts me is how some churches try to slap a new coat of paint on good ‘ol Halloween. They call it Hallelujah Harvest Hayride or something insipid like that.

Now, let me get this straight – for your churched-up event, you are going to let all the kids dress in costumes, collect candy, go on a hayride in the middle of the night, and sit around a glowing campfire telling stories. Oh yeah, that’s SO different from Halloween.

Give me a break. The only way you’re ever going to get away from the Halloween comparison is to have your event in February. Try having your hayride then.

So, why am I getting all spun up about Halloween, instead of following my usual live and let live mentality? Because I am sick and tired of having holiday spoilers (you know who you are) try to ruin some of the happiest childhood memories I have.

My Halloween memories are not cloaked in dark, haunted nights. They bask in the glow of friendly front door lights, shining flashlights, and the gleaming bounty of the mound of collected candy counted out under the radiance of the living room lamp.

I relished the opportunity to exercise my imagination – what would I be for Halloween? Decisions, decisions! Usually I settled on Laura Ingalls, Caddy Woodland, and (one year) Mabel from the Grandma’s Attic Series – okay, okay – I loved the “prairie” dress my Grandma made for me and wore it every chance I got!

After getting costumed up, Mom would grab our flashlights, and we’d head out in the neighborhood. All the kids and parents were out admiring one another’s costumes. Turning around, assuming the various flying positions of super heroes, or in my case, pretending to use my “rope” to lasso a cow.

Then a group of us (and our parents) would go door to door, ringing doorbells, sing-songing TRICK-OR-TREAT in chorus, and then THANK YOU as the bite-sized-pieces were dropped into our bags. After a full circle around the block, we’d head back home, where Dad was eating hot buttery popcorn (which he’d share with just a little friendly persuasion), and keeping busy between watching the news and answering the door.

The three of us would look at my haul, and Mom and Dad would do a quick preview of the candy before it would go into the candy jar to (hopefully) last for (at least) a…week, or so!

Sometimes, we’d go over to my cousins’ house and check out their costumes. My Aunt Kathy loved to tell the story of how one year my cousin Charity dressed up like a gypsy. I asked her why she had dressed up to be a homeless person. All the adults thought it was funny, but Charity didn’t talk to me the whole night!

Those memories are warm and fuzzy, and I’m even smiling now as I remember them. I’m sure there was evil afoot (I’ve always wanted to say that) on those nights as well, but those were the nights and the memories that make up my childhood. I refuse to paint it anything other than it was – good, ‘ol (yes, even) old fashioned, family fun!

Now, I agree the times have changed. Nowadays, I do think it’s safer to just take kids to the homes of people you know, instead of opening those innocent bags to everybody and their brother. But I also think it is a great way to be a part of your neighborhood and your community. To build trust within your block and witness to your neighbors.

So, Brett and I will be handing out candy to little pirates, princesses, and possibly-future-purse-snatchers on Tuesday. We’ll get to see our neighbors, compliment those costumes, and talk a while. So that their kids will have the same great memories we do of this fun (and often rainy) night.

If you don’t like it, create your own holiday. Just don’t do it on Halloween. I hear February’s open.